I Hate Eye Doctors...

Well, the one that treated me in the eye van that comes up once a year to this shitty town. Okay...for those of you who only know me thru my blogs...yes, I wear glasses and have since I was 5. The optometrist's assistant puts drops in my eyes to freeze them and them attempts to poke my cornea with some gizmo that looks like an oversized felt-tipped pen. Now, for those who don't know this test, it's a test to check for glaucoma. The test I'm used to is the one where you stick your head in a quasi-vise and have 'puffs' of air blown at your eyeball, and then they test the tension.I was informed that that test was not as accurate as some stranger physically poking my eye. So, try as I might, I just couldn't keep my eyes open to do it. I kept apologizing, and the lady seemed to understand, so she puts some other drops in my eyes which just stung like hell, but what those drops did was cause my pupils to dilate so that the eye doc can take a better look at my peepers. Okay...so I sit, and wait, and am amused at how blurry my vision was, and boy, were they sensitive to light. Finally (about 3 hours later) I am called to see the optometrist. He proceeds to put my head in a 'quasi vise', puts some different drops in my eyes, which really stung like crazy, then tries to force my eyes open so he could force a blue coulored lightbulb against my cornea. Holy fuck. okay ladies and gents...what happens when you get something in your eyes that causes them to burn and sting? That's right, you sharp minded bloggers..you try to blink. Involuntarily. He got fed up. He goes so far as to say that I 'wasn't his star patient today'. Oh excuse me your majesty....if you told me beforehand what you planned to do, I may have been a bit more cooperative. He also seemed pissed that I would ask if I was a candidate for laser surgery to help correct some of the astigmatism I possess. He gave me a dirty look and basically told me no, not really, because I'm also far-sighted and it wouldn't be 100%, but if I could 'live with that' it would be fine. Then I asked about the possibility of contacts down the road. He looked mad..and then he reminds me again that I have 'really bad astigmatism,', and also how my eyes are so sensitive that 'contacts would be a difficult challenge', and he wasn't sure if they could make them special for me. Anyhoo, he then says he wouldn't advise it. He gives me a presciption for slightly stronger specs, altho he stated I 'probably wouldn't need it', even tho I told him that a week prior to the appointment I'd been waking up with seriously blurred vision that took 15 minutes to clear up. He seemed like a smarmy asshole so fuck him...I'll get a second opinion. 5 years ago, I was told by my former specialist that I had a 95% chance of improved vision with laser, with only 5% chance of scarring of the cornea. 10 years before that my chances were 50-50....50% chance of vision improving...50% chance of going BLIND from the laser. Technology is getting better all the time, so I will hold on to the belief that someday I may get to wear contacts (even if it's only a once-in-a-blue-moon-thing). No matter. His assistant says the glasses I've had for the past 5 years are so strong, that what I can see at 20 feet, a person with 20-20 vision sees at 25 feet. So there. He pissed me off so much that day, I felt like I had a black cloud hanging over my head. I mean...if I get to the point where I cannot perform on stage without the specs, it will limit the roles I can play. And when it all comes down to it, our eyes, for those who see, are all we really have. Some may take their sight for granted, but I don't. I've had 2 instances in my life where I experienced temporary blindness, and it scared the shit out of me. It's not fun. But, I will, regardless of what the eye dude thinks of me, will hold my head up high, and I choose to hope for a better prognosis in the near future.
Okay,so I'm done my rant for the night...Blogger question time...tell me of the most unpleasant test you've had to do...okay...Now some tests that deal with men and women down there don't have to be counted, but if that was the worst exam, then the second worst. Also...give me a shout out if you still read my Blogs...where did y'all go?
Blog ya later!