I'm Back in Buisiness...
Hello all you wild and crazy bloggers! Okay...good news from Strangers camp...I've got my comp up and running again! Whoo hoo! No help from the vindictive ex (of course), so I bought the stuff I needed and my computer runs even better now. Not only that, but am learning how much of a liar the ex was...case in point...he told me before how it would take a week solid to put all the programs back on my computer, should I get my programs back...ummm no...I talked to a very reliable person (the one who programmed this puppy here), and told him what ex boyfriend said, and I got a strange look. For you see ladies and gents, it took this programmer less than five hours to put it back in order. Thats right!!!! Five hours!!!!FIVE HOURS!!!!! Best money I ever spent, let me tell you. This kind programmer (whose family is close to mine and are good, decent HONEST people ) also were awesome enough to get all the protection that I would need against hackers, and threw in a program for me so I can watch my DVDS if I'm like say, on a bus, travelling across country again. So, you know, that lie the ex told me regarding my comp wasn't the first lie he ever told me. Hmmm...okay, I'll admit people that I don't know everything about comps (this is my first one) so I thought it strange that he would say I had no ability to put a password on my computer. So, I asked a close friend (Pinky) if this was so, and she said no, you can put a password, and so she showed me how. But not before ex went onto my comp when I was away to check my email and my history. I had googled some friends names from years ago to see if I could find out what they were up to, and for a week later would get cryptic questions from ex like " so..hows so and so?". Keep the computer programs if you like buddy...you'll never take them away from me again.
Okay, I feel better about my rant...if I learned anything, it's not to trust people off the bat. And don't meet people over the phone, or email...you end up regretting it in the end. I must say that this whole experience has made me appreciate singlehood more than I ever have in my life. No complications, no raging emotions and heartache and insecure individuals. I doubt I'll be in a relationship ever again. Oh yes, some may scoff (including the ex- I know you check this site) but scoff away. I'm not interested in games fueled by insecurity anymore. Not interested in being a housewife, none of that. I've grown tired of the game...never wanted to play the game to begin with....but I feel I was somewhat thrust into that position. More than once. I'm sure there are other women out there who've been in or are currently in that situation. Maybe men feel something similar, but right now I'm talking to the ladies in the house. Ladies...these are a few instances where you should doubt your man's faithfulness or motives and run far away from him...
1) If the guy mentions he's an asshole on your first date when you ask him to describe himself...just tell him ' don't call me I'll call you', and just don't call him.
2) If the guy you're with doesn't like your family, or your friends...cut him out of your life (seriously girls, it's a warning sign for future abuse).
3) If he calls you names, trust me he means what he says, no matter how much he tries to apologize after.
4) If he constantly changes jobs, or quits his job with no job lined up, he's not a stable person.
5)A guy that talks for hours and hours and hours and hours and hours, just to make one point, while the people around him squirm and look like they're trying to get away...sign of insecurity. Trust me, he'll never listen to a darn word that ever comes out of your mouth, he just likes the sound of his voice.
6) Remember ladies...no boyfriend buys cute little stuffed animals for anyone other than you. If its a child relation, fine...if it's a grown woman he works with...not cool.
7) If he takes off to go have "coffee" with a girl he met online he claims is a 'buisiness partner", also not cool, especially when 'coffee' takes 6 hours to accomplish, and they are nowhere near a coffee shop, but rather in a secluded spot. Hmmmm...
8) Let's see... oh! If you're on vacation with your boyfriend, and he gets a call to see his 'co-worker' who lives 2 hours away, and he sleeps on her 'couch' that night cause he's too tired to drive back to the hotel room, while you sit there by yourself.....so very not cool.
Okay, so I have more, but I'd like to hear some warings signs from the ladies. I kinda blame myself, as these things happened while I was in relationships, and I always thought..well, he's a nice guy...he wouldn't step out on me. I kinda turned off the radar so to speak, or rather I let my heart lead everything. So that was my stupidity. I have learned from it. Now granted, I'm not a peach when I'm crossed, but for me, I expect relationships to be rocky at times...when it comes to disagreements, differences of opinion, etc. I will admit I've never been terribly a romantic person. If I care about a person, I show in the everyday little things, not words. Like, I'll cook dinner and such. I don't like being expected to say i love you a hundred times a day...it's just words...actions to me speak louder than words. Like working an extra job when your significant other is sick, even if it frustrates you, and causes strain. I've spent many a sleepless night out here in the Back Forty... wondering how things could've turned out so bad...why I stayed for so long. I always speak my mind and I won't change that for anyone...even if that was a factor in the breakup. I refuse to be something I'm not in a relationship. I think the biggest factor was...he changed to something he wasn't, and that saddened me. I still have to muddle through some feelings of resentment, but as the days go by I'm finding it much easier to deal with. I have to say, my family has been a huge strength. They have gone to great lengths to help me heal. My friends, even if they are miles away, also support me. So that makes me happy. I really want to move forward in my life. Closure is a good thing....so long as you can avoid bringing on the bad Karma bit. I want to send out a big Blogger hug to all you ladies who have been hurt in a relationship, and send you good energy to move forward and be the happiest people you can be.
Okay on a more serrious note...I saw in the news that London was bombed yet again. Dave, my Blogger pal, are you and Vic okay???I know you only Blog once a month, but, by god, if you see my Blog, just drop a line and let me know you and yours are well. Still praying for your safety.
Keep on Blogging!!!

5 Comments:
Tales of lessons learned... pretty tough things you had to get through but you will survive. You're a strong chick, with a good head on your shoulders... you are aware of the warning signs and I KNOW you will never fall victim to them again. Nor will I. Thanks for always taking the time to blog... good to know someone else has some intelligent thoughts that they're willing to share from time to time.
My own warning sign from my ex... HUGE now that I think of it. Spent a large amount of time with him when he lived in a different city from me. Then he decided to move to Lethbridge to be closer to me, and to move our relationship in a more serious direction. He quit his job, moved to town with 25.00 in his pocket. Now that's a notion just filled with fucking promise huh? Oh yeah, sure... come live with me babe, I know we haven't been together all that long but sure, I'll support ya. Not only this but he continued to sponge off of me for months upon months until I forced him to get a job. From August until November the only sudden spurts of motivation that struck him were the moments when the controller for the playstation came unplugged and he had to get off his add to plus the damned thing back in.
Oh shit lol Damn typos... "he had to get off his add"? Hmm.... ass. Yup, much better. lol
I should really learn to proof read lol... change plus to plug too! Holy crap, I need to go to bed before I start noticing anymore typos. These blogs need edit buttons lol
Yup...what is it with these guys anyways..but that's definately a sign your guy is no good--he plays too many games, with Playstation or without. Keep the signs coming all ladies in cyberspace!!! We need to be aware so this doesn't happen again.
Stranger, I'm touched by your concern. Thanks so much.
Vic and I are fine, we're just hella busy with the wedding plans, hence my lack of updates. A little over 2 months to go and things are going according to plan, although I think we have too many guests and not enough room!
Oh, and on behalf of all the nice guys in the world, I apologise. :)
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