All I got is time...

I'm having one of those days, ladies and gents. I know I am far from old, and the ravages of age have not even thought of making an appearance on my visage..however........................I'm feeling at present like the world is passing me by. Its been nearly 2 weeks since I got back from vacation, and I'm just coming down from the high; the high being the energy, culture, unique experiences that I was momentarily a part of. It almost feels like it was a dream. And in a weird way, am feeling like a Cinderella amongst the ashes. A brainy Cinderella, mind you, with a fantastic haircut and Armani specs. My mind bursts with ideas for myself, and I try with the precious little spare time I have outside the restaurant to fill it with intellectual pusuits. Right now I've begun "The Birth of Tragedy" by Neitzsche. Its not an easy read mind you, but I am making my way through it without too much trouble. He discusses the origins of Drama as we know it, and its fascinating shit. Although it would only make sense to someone who has read ancient Greek plays and have a fair working knowledge of Greek mythology, culture, and rituals. I guess my disadvantage of being in this town was made painfully apparent the other day. I had a guy come in who only stops in for coffee. He doesn't speak much English, but speaks Spanish and French fluently. He doesn't say much, and always comes in when I'm there, paying for his coffee by depositing a twoonie in my hand so he can briefly touch it, which kinda unnerves me a little...you know...personal bubble that has expanded somewhat since the Ostrich. Anyhoo..he gets his coffee, and I sit at one table and begin reading my book. He asks in his halting English where he could sit. I told him he could sit anywhere he liked. He sits across from me. I ignore him and continue reading. He asks after a minute of silence what I was reading. I showed him the front of the book. He shrugs. I said "It's by Neitzsche." He shrugs. I say, "He was a German philosopher." Again the comic shrug. I try to explain to him in simple terms exactly what I was reading. Turns out that was a wasted effort..all I got were confused looks and exaggerated shrugging of the shoulders. I guess he didn't read much. So I gave up and opened the book again and shortly thereafter he leaves.
I've noticed that I haven't had many intelligent conversations in town. Papa Lou used to have interesting discussions of life, politics, religion, some philosophy, but he's dead now. My parents are good to talk to when it comes to the war thats going on and other world conflicts. But there is no one my age here that can keep up with me so to speak, and its driving me a tad crazy. My aunt and I trade books back and forth, especially fiction, history, and anthropological studies. But she lives a ways away, and we don't get much chance to discuss books we've both read because she works as much as me.
God...my Kingdom already.....
And there are my dreams...dreaming..its all I do. Brings to mind when I worked as a housekeeper in a hospital. I'd clean rooms and I'd be in my mind, imagining myself on a stage, and knowing that that was what made me feel complete...whole even. The daydreaming happens now almost all the time..I can be fixing up a pizza and my mind wanders to performing, or thinking up scenes I could be writing for a play...or directing. And yet I know I'm in the wrong place, but I cannot leave Mom here by herself. And so I feel like I'm on some sort of desert island...lost in a sea of mediocrity. Perhaps others here are content with their lives. In a way I long for contentment, but theres this drive I cannot explain...its been with me since childhood. Theres no rhyme or reason for it....al I know is when I am doing what I love I'm fine..when I'm not I am restless....and I feel the drive in the pit of my stomach, urging me to move forward. This feeling is much stronger now. I don't know where it'll take me....instinct has always led me..I follow. I have gotten sidetracked true..but ended up on track again. Right now it feels likeI'm on the racetrack, and have driven into a pitstop to change the tires and stuff. Meanwhile all the other cars are whizzing by...they've become a blur where I stand, motionless. I guess I'm asking a question no one can answer except for me and God. But I felt like I needed to get it out. Anyone out there who has gone through what I am experiencing right now? Anyone actually at that crossroad? Any advice? I could use a friendly word or two. Drop me a line if you're around.
Cheers.

My Vacation Part 3

I guess I should finish up this saga..on the last day of my trip I began my ardurous journey back to the Back Forty. My sis drops me off at the Robert Q bus station at 4:30 am on the 18th, and we headed out to TO in the dark. On the way we stop in Woodstock to pick up a couple of passengers. I am a person who is sensitive to scents, and buddy who squeezed in next to me must've been chewing some really strong minty gum..normally this wouldn't bother me but I dunno..maybe I was overtired or it was really strong, but he just reeked of this stuff, and it began to give me a super massive headache. I cover my nose with the sleeve of my coat and breathe through the fibres for the rest of the trip to Toronto Pearson Airport.
We arrive, and the driver, who was super nice, drove right up to the terminal doors and unloaded my heavy suitcases for me. Talk about top notch service. Beats having to fight with Grey Dog passengers to find your luggage under a bus. Anyhoo, I get to the Westjet desk, and pick up my ticket. I make my way through security, which never takes me long because I'm smart enough not to wear shit that beeps through the detector. All those other hapless sons of bitches ahead of me though beeped, and had to go through the long process of the metal wand, plus they had to take off their belts, and their shoes. I was happy to note that it was mostly white people who had to go through this rigorous inspection..no racial profiling here, and I was pleased to note that there were ethnic minorities that were running the machines..some who were obviously Muslim. But they did their jobs well, and waved me through without any holdups.
I make my way upstairs so that I can find the nearest Tim Hortons to get some breakfast and a coffee, as my stomach started growling, and I had about 3 hours to kill before my flight even thought of taking off. I get my food, and am making my way to a smoking section I'd remembered the last time I'd been there, only a year ago. I find much to my dismay, that it has been overtaken by the non smoking majority. Thinking that somehow the room had been moved I went up to a security guard, and politely asked him where I could find the nearest smoking room. He politely informs me that there is a tobacco ban throughout the entire facility, and if I needed to smoke I'd have to leave the terminal and go outside to partake of the cancer stick. I sat. I thought maybe Icould handle not smoking before the flight, then about 1 minute later changed my mind and went outside to have a cigarette. I then had to go back in through security and go throught the metal detectors, which took a little longer due to the fact a mom ahead of me had to take off her belt, and her shoes, and had her bags opened and carefully inspected by the staff. I then had to wait while the lady put her shoes and belt back on, then wrestle her baby carriage ahead and all the whie try to carry her carry on and a baby diaper bag. I go thru in 1 minute. I then went upstairs again and sat and waited for the flight, noting with amusement that a toddler was smiling and pointing at me. I gave her a little listen on my headphones my tunes on my MP3. She then wanted to practice her walking, and so her dad, holding her hands above her head, let her practice walking down the hall. The lady next to me told me the kid was great on the flight they'd just been on. I envied that woman, as I thought back to various trips I've taken over the years with a screaming toddler or infant. Anyhoo...finally the flight is announced, and I scoot in to be the first in line for general boarding. I get in the plane and take my seat. Am instantly more scared of flying than when I flew down. So I said a mental prayer, and crossed myself as the plane began taxiing down the runway. Hey..I never take chances...if theres a time where I need the man upstairs to keep a watchful eye over me its when I travel..regardless of the mode of transportation.
The plane is beginning to ascend, and I'm feeling the gravity pull sinking me into the seat, which is a very disconcerting feeling. I try to control my breathing..in through the nose..out through the mouth..relax. I felt extremely lightheaded and felt myself on the verge of fainting before the plane was even 20, 000 ft. I make it though, and I did manage to sleep for about 15 minutes, then was awakened with the sensation that my ears were ready to pop..painfully...And they did. Quite painfully. I grabbed some gum out of my purse and began chewing furiously, all the while riding turbulence from hell, and feeling like either I was about to faint again, or I was about to make good use of the complimentary barf bags convienently stashed in the seat pocket ahead of me. After a tense few moments..the plane lands, a little bumpy..and puts on its breaks. I give a mental prayer of thanks that I was back on firm ground, and begin the process of leaving the plane. I made my way down to the luggage area, and a few minutes later I retrieved my luggage and went outside for a smoke. There is a glass walled contained room for smokers, but I decided I didn't want to look like a freak in a freak show with people walking by and looking in at us poor rejects. So I sat on a bench, had my smoke, and talked briefly to a security dude who told me that Manitouwadge had a big snowstorm a few days previous. At that moment, was feeling glad that I'd brought my winter coat. Finally the transit driver from my town popped by to pick me up and we began the journey back to Manitouwadge. I was a little concerned that mom would yell at me first thing when she saw my chopped locks, but I figured she'd get over it soon enough. I finally got to the restaurant at 6:30pm, and when I walked in, yes mom did yell...but calmed down after I gave her a hug and told her what I did with the hair. I then put my suitcases in the back room, and put on an apron and worked until 10pm so mom could get some rest.
So there you have it...my trip. Hoped it was interesting. I have to say my trip was great, and even though a week has passed since I arrived home, and aproximately 5 days since mom left to go back out west, I still feel rested and good. Nothing much interesting has happened since..just work and sleep mostly. So I shall end the blog entry for tonight. Starting............now.

My Vacation...Part 2

Yours truly spent the next day of her vacation resting at sis's place. I did take a walk and checked ut a few blocks. London I think is styled much like London in England. Most of the houses here are from Victorian times....and some are historic buildings. There is a house in London with a dedication to Frederick Banting. Yup..London is the birthpace of the creation of insulin, which diabetics everywhere depend on to live. The streets here have names like "york" and "Oxford', and even "Piccadilly". Quite a charming city, let me tell you. Not to mentoin completly overrun by squirrels, which I found cute, but sis found completely alarming.
Well the next day (11th) it rained like hell. My sis came home from work, and after hurriedly eating, we made the 2 hour trek to Toronto to see the Pet Shop Boys in concert. The Hummingbird Centre is just huge, and we got a good seat up in the balcony area. And the concert was simply amazing! A simple set, composed of a box, and a lounging chair on stage left and Chris' keyboard on stage right. Throughout the show, the box would open up, much like origami, and the dancers, backup singers and Neil utilized the space. The costumes were terrific. Neil came out in stage in the second half of the show dressed like a decorated general during the song "Sodom and Gommorrah". I danced my way through the concert. A lot of people around me didn't, but I say if you can't totally enjoy yourself at one of these concerts, you got no business being there.But the band got the whole audience up on their feet near the end. And it was a terrific concert. I dropped an insane amount of money at the show. I bought the program, three t shirts, a hat, and a print of a drawing of the 'boys. Well worth it. I was also super stoked to find out they have a new album coming out on the 23rd of this month. What can I say? I'm a PetHead.
The weather was still nasty on our way back to London. We passed an accident where it appeared that someone had rolled off the 401 into the ditch. The smell of burning rubber was strong, and judging by the fact I didn't see paramedics there, I had to conclude that the driver was most likely dead. I say..slow the fuck down y'all!!! Especially with rain coming down so hard you can't see thru the windshield even with the wipers going.
Thursday I cleaned up a bit and when my sis got home, we ate then went out to do a bit of shopping. Friday was the same, and yours truly now has a t-shirt that says "Vote for Pedro". I got sis a t-shirt that said "I see dumb people". I like t-shirts with kitchy sayings. Anyhoo, I also stopped at a kiosk that was selling a ceramic straightening iron, and the guy demonstated its effectiveness on my long unruly hair, and I was impressed how straight and shiny my hair was after the process. But..OMG!! It cost 120 bucks. I think I'll still pick it up before i leave here..god knows they don't have anything that fantastic in Manitouwadge.
After the trek through the mall, and bookstore (picked up books by Neitzche, Aristotle and Dostoyevsky) we met up with a friend of my sisters and went to go see "School of Scoundrels" at the movie theatre. I absolutely loved the movie, and laughed my fool head off through the whole thing. If you haven't seen it yet, its great. Trust me..go see it.
The next day (Saturday) we did more shopping, then went home. Yours truly went for a walk cause i don't get to do that enough at home, and took a different route, making sure I paid attention where I was, lest I get lost. I found myself at a hair salon, so I went inside. I asked if they took walk ins. They did. I decided to chop off most of my long locks, which at the time, reached my butt, and cut it off shoulder length, with a few nice layers. But don't fear gentle readers..I asked that the long pieces go to Angel Hair for Kids. They make wigs for kids suffering from cancer and alopecia. I had no regrets, but I imagine my mom won't be too impressed when I get back, because i hadn't told her yet. My hair looks good. And the girl who fixed my hair should be proud. I mean, I gave her full rein on deciding what I should have with the only exception that it be no shorter than shoulder length. She even used a straightening iron and damn..it looked soo good. Went back to the apartment, and my sis was pleasantly surprised I took the plunge and stopped looking like a gypsy. I like how I don't have to use so much shampoo and conditioner, and my head feels lighter. My old hair had some weight to it. If you're ever in the London area, and need a new do..see the fine people at Innovations Hair Salon. And for all you people who do have at least 10 inches of hair you can part with..you can donate to angel hair for kids and in the states its Locks of Love. Virgin hair is best, but if your hair is in good condition they'll accept it. I think I had over a foot of hair i donated. Too late to measure now I guess.
Sunday I went to dinner with my sister at a Greek restaurant called Mykonos. Some really good food there. I ordered the Mykonos platter, which had a little bit of everything, and left full, and satisfied. We also checked out a few art stores, as my sis wanted to get some art supplies.
Today I lounged around..did some laundry, and then went out with sis to do a bit of shopping and pick up a couple pizzas to take home and eat while watching "Monster In Law"..a movie I hadn't seen yet, but picked up for next to nothing at a liquidation shop. I also had to pick up extra luggage cause I got a lot of stuff to take home. Which leaves me up to the present moment..as I type these keys. I am now going to go partake of a coffin nail out of doors then am planning on settling in to watch a bit of TV before shut eye. I'll try to blog tomorrow, but i will most likely wait til I get back to the Back Forty before i finish typing out this saga. Until then...

My Vacation: Part 1

I guess I'll have to describe my vacation in chunks. Okay...at 3 am, on the 9th I began my trek from Manitouwadge with my Dad to the GreyDog station in Marathon. The bus was late (of course!), making me think (momentarily) that I'd missed the damned thing. It did show up approximately 15 minutes late, and I'd boarded the bus after ensuring my luggage was stored below. The bus was full, but managed to find a seat on the right hand side in the second row. A young guy, approx 19 years old, asked if he could sit there too. So he sits, and puts a chunk of tobacco in his mouth, and hawked his spittle in his empty pop bottle, much to my disgust. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I do smoke, but not on a bus. So I was considering the injustice of me having to wait til the next convienent stop for which to partake of my cancer stick, all the while he gets to keep the monkey off his back the whole trip, and also succeeding in nearly making me vomit on the bus about 3 times. I finally get to Thunder Bay, not having slept a wink though I thought I would, because at some point biddy sitting next to me decided he would sleep, and take up his seat and part of mine. Not only that, but he (in true Monty Python fashion) FARTED in my general direction. Dazed, confused, and quite nauseated I made my way to the nearest phone to call a cab. The cab was a massively expensive ride..over 20 dollars for a 5 min drive to the airport, which led me to conclude he was overcharging me for the fare. I didn't say anything, cause I figured Karma would get him in the end. I managed to wheel my luggage to the WestJet desk, and they were nice enough to take care of my bag. I went and got some coffee, as it would be an hour before i could nestle into my seat on the plane, and , (I hoped) could get an hour or two of shuteye. But fate had something else in store for me, and it was in the form of a screaming infant, and three loudmouth middle aged men, who I had to finally shush because I couldn't hear the flight attendants on what to do with the air mask in case of depressurization of the cabin. I make it a point to pay attention, even if I know it by rote.
We ascend into the stratosphere..I sitting at a window seat, the curtain I'd closed because I didn't need visual confirmation that I was leaving the safety of the ground. The plane ascended to 40,000 ft. The infant is still screaming. I notice some popping happening in my ears. I try to listen to my mp3 player, but no matter how high I turned it, the sound of the plane, the baby screaming, and the three loudmouth fucks behind me just wouldn't shut up.
As we near Toronto airport we began our descent. The torturous stabbing of the eardrums begins. The pain is excruciating...the baby screaming louder in the distance. I begin to get a headache, and was thinking at the time if the darn seatbelt sign wasn't on, I'd get up and give the mother of that baby a hard time.
Eventually, we descend, as I watch, in fascination, how the planes wing, only feet from my face, seperates to help manoever the vessel smoothly back to terra firma. I wait impatiently for the plane's doors to open, and wait (even more impatiently) for the idiots ahead of me to get their asses organized and get the hell out of the plane. Finally, I am off the plane, and make my way to the baggage claim area. The strap on my purse breaks and I am left holding the bulky thing in the crook of my elbow like a football, as I begin the endless wait for my sole piece of luggage to make its way down the conveyor belt. After about 20 minutes, my bag appears. Cursing, I grab the heavy thing and hurriedly head out the door, knowing my sis who'd been waiting on the other side had been waiting a very long time for me. We go to find her car in the massive concrete parking lot, and make our way into the heart of Toronto, ending up in the Danfort, otherwise known as Greektown. There, we shopped at open markets, browsed in various stores, bought sweets, and strolled down the streets, feeling completely at home.
That done, we head out of Toronto, and make the 2 hour drive to my sisters home in London. We got home late, and I was so glad to finally put my head down for a long nights rest.
Tune in tomorrow for Part 2....

Only 3 hours before I begin my jouney!!!

Yup..yours truly is now counting down the hours before she takes the long trek, first by car, then by bus, then by plane, then automobile to get to her destination...approximate time it'll take..oh, about 13 hrs. Yeah..I guess I coulda taken a bus the whole way, but I wasn't too keen on going past Sudbury. My sis had to take that route a few times, and she said it blew chunks. As much as I dislike being thousands of feet up in the air I will bite the bullet. Oh yeah..did I mention I'm a white knuckle flyer? The first time I was on a plane and felt it leaving the ground, I had to cover my mouth with my hands to muffle the screams. Yeah..I have a prob with heights. And enclosed spaces...especially around holidays when I know it'll be packed. Sigh. Though a few other times I flew I was fortunate to be sitting next to seasoned air travellers who had the foresight to keep me distracted from that "left terra firma" feeling by talking to me. I should be ok tho. I really hate turbulence..and I really hate it when they descend too fast, cause the pain in my ears is so bad I want to cry.But I've taken precautions...One..I am bringing gum to chomp on..Two..I haven't slept in 2 days in anticipation of this trip so I'm thinking the minute I get into my seat and affix the belt snugly around my waist, I should be out like a light. Its become a ritual, or maybe its an annoying habit I've aquired thru the years that I never sleep the night before a long trip. Mostly I think its my procrastinating nature..I put stuff off til the last minute almost all the time. Though I must say that today there was a good reason why I just finished packing my suitcase an hour ago. Today I had to help Dad take the plants down and put all the gardening equipment away til next year. Then Dad decided to take the old van out of storage in one garage, and put it in the garage at the other house mom owns. Problem was..the van kept stalling out, cause of a dead battery and try as he might, with the help of a friend he couldn't juice it up enough to drive the damn thing to the new house which was on the other side of town. So they decided to use our truck to tow the van whilst it was in neutral, with me driving my Dads friends car behind them with my hazard lights flashing. Wow...I was soo scared, cause a couple of times going down a hill, the van almost smashed into the rear of the truck, cause aparantly the brakes had quit in the van too. Picture me, driving a Buick Le Sabre behind an F-150, towing a van which is helplessly swaying back and forth as we went thru turns. Then we couldn't make our turn because there were 3 cars approaching..so we all had to carry on past to the High School, then drive around the parking lot there to double back and get to the right turn off. We made it tho, then we had to push the van into the garage.After that was done, Dad decided we may as well get Moms antique table and multitude of chairs out of the basement of a family friends and take it to Moms new house and set it up. Heavy stuff..by the time I was done moving all this stuff, I had a few bruises and some seriously sore muscles. Yes I took Ibuprofen, but I'll have to take a few more in a bit..otherwise my back will have some serious pain. Then I worked til 8pm..finished my laundry and packing, and now am patiently waiting til its time to get a move on. Not too long now. Oh, by the way..Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Though I think in the States Thanksgiving falls on a different date, and I'm not sure what people in England do for that holiday either. I already had some turkey,but maybe I'll take a sandwich with me so I can fall asleep faster. At any rate, whether you're feasting on turkey to day or no, I hope its a wonderful day.
Keep in mind, Blog family, that I may not blog too much while on holiday, but I will try to blog when I can to keep you all up to snuff! Okay? Great..see ya later!

Sad news...

A friend of the family died last night of a heart attack. He was 82. Dad said he was one of the first people he met when he first came to Canada in the late 60's. I loved the man cause he was like a granddad to me. Papa Lou..I will miss you.

Good Thing I Had All That Energy....

Turns out that I worked nonstop from 10 am til not too long ago (about 11:30pm). I seriously didn't sit down for a break til 9:30pm, and that was for 5 minutes. Yeah..My legs feel like they want to just fall off. Oh well. And to top it all off...I handled this super busy feels-more-like-a-friday all by myself, as my Mom went to go get Dad at the Thunder Bay airport. Wow. I'm super happy Dads home...he needs a break too. He dropped a lot of weight since the last I saw him...he's been working like crazy. But hopefully he'll be more relaxed over the next few days.
Okay....those of you who regularly check the site know that in May, our beloved Alexandrine Parrot Cosmo passed away. When I went to help Dad with some packages he brought in from the truck..there in front of me was another Alexandrine Parrot. He (its a he..Mom has the papers) is named "Rodeo" (God! I hate it when pet stores give these birds silly names)..he's only a year old, and is already talking. Poor little guy was scared at first, but when he was brought upstairs and met the other birdies we have, he calmed right down. I guess he's glad he won't be alone..or worse yet..planned for someones dinner.He is quite large..but his markings are not completely in yet..the black collar will show up within the next year. Such a handsome boy. I guess the Africa Grey I wanted is still there..talking up a storm, and his price has been reducedby a couple hundred bucks.. Hmmm..maybe hes getting vicious..who knows?I am slightly perturbed that Mom got an exact replica of the one we lost, but at the same time, I'm happy too, cause she's been able to get over Cosmos demise.SO now..here is our birdie family..in no particular order..
Rodeo..The Alexandrine parrott, our latest edition and the biggest bird here.
Casey...The Quaker Monk Parakeet, my absolute fave and by far the smartest of the crew and most cuddly.
Sunny and Coco..our Cockatiels..Sunny is yellow, and Coco is dark, but both are pretty happy campers..both can do the wolf whistle.
Bubby..The Peachfaced Lovebird...loves Mom and will bite everyone else who comes near...loves her baths in her little yellow bathtub.Plus..she says "Peek a Boo!", and can play the game with you.
John and Poncharello...our paraleets.Notorious for chirping rapidly and angrily when you change their water and food. They are brothers, and look so cute at night when they sleep on their perch, as they sit side by side. Ponch likes to bite..John doesn't.
Seven birds..wow..who needs a freakin alarm clock anymore???

I Can't Believe It's Not Insomnia!!!

Hi All! Yes..yours truly actually went to bed at 2am last night and got up...(drumroll please) at 7am. I don't know if the shorter hours is a sign of getting older..ever notice those coffin dodgers seem to all get up at 5am after like 3 hours of sleep? AT any rate..I am awake..which is for me rare.
I guess I'm excited. Sure I coulda smacked the alarm clock a few more times, and then gotten up at 9am, giving me plenty of time to clean the birdcages and get to the restaurant to prep for another day.But I learned something so exciting, that I am just chomping at the bit to get my day accomplished already. My mother is going to Thunder Bay. In fact she left just a half hour ago. No, I'm not ecstatic about her leaving me..I'm ecstatic about what..or rather who..she's picking up at the airport. Yup..the guy who was supposed to come back with Mom but didn't, cause of work. My DAD!!!!! So I'm super happy. I won't be happy though..if other people monopolize the time I have with him. There are some guys out there who like Dad cause he'll buy them a beer now and then. Not that my Dad is a pushover..far from it...my Dad is well aware of bullshit...in fact, he's got one of the best bullshit detectors I've ever seen. He just talks with the person for like a minute, and based on their responses and actions, he can tell you exactly what the person is like. And he's never been wrong. I think its pretty cool. Anyhoo..I just wanted to type this on my blog. Thanks still for the comments, from friends old and new,...those who are new can post anonymously...I think I'll figure out who you are anyways if I know you.At any rate am a happy camper right now......just as long as idiot locals don't screw it up! Have a good day everyone!

Close call with nature.....and the years have been kind.

Tonight I had a close run in with a creature common out here in the Back Forty, but one of the least desirable to run into in a dark alley. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I had a close run in with a skunk! Scared the piss outta me let me tell you. I was out on the back porch of the resturant having a smoke break when I hear a rustling in the leaves of the driveway. I look over, and there it is..not even 3 feet away from me, it's tail up already to warn me he was locked and loaded. With a few well chosen expletives muttered under my breath, I slowly back away and made a hasty retreat into the safety of the restaurant, making sure I shut the heavy back door behind me, lest the noxious creature make its way into the storeroom and give me a night I'd not soon forget. My mom was upstairs resting, so I made sure to call her and let her know that if she'd planned on coming down to keep me company, she should just cancel those plans. Finally after about 15 minutes, I checked out back to make sure Gods smelliest creature had gone on its merry way, and I noted with great satisfaction (not to mention relief!) that it had. Whew!
You see, this isn't my first run in with Pepe Le Phew! One actually came in the front door one time, and I had to yell like some deranged person, throwing rolls of paper towel at it to entice it to leave...it did, but it sprayed a bit on the floor. Thank God I was just closing..I cleaned up, and sprayed the air with air freshener which did the trick. Wow..what next eh? A bear? One did get into the restaurant at the hotel once years ago..gave the people there a fright. Lotsa bears up here...mainly looking for food they can munch on, as the blueberries the past couple years was in short supply. If a bear came in I think I'd just freak out. I'd probably have to grab Dads gun and dispatch the thing in short order. But I wouldn't worry about the carcass being there long..Somebody'd come along and take it for food. Yup..people eat the craziest shit up here.
Anyhoo..I'd meant to post about this a week ago but hadn't then today it happened to me again! I was actually asked for ID at the Bargain store when I went to pick up smokes. Yeah..it was wierd the first time, cause its been a long time since I was a spring chicken. This time I actually had my ID with me, and the lady looked at my year of birth then said Ok. Lol!!! Funny thing is last year when I went to Alberta I was ID'd and told by the dude behind the counter that I looked "borderline"..Wow! You mean to tell me that I look approximately 13 yrs younger than I actually am??? Sweet! Out here the legal age to purchase smokes is 19, so hey..I guess I still got it. Actually, I looked at pictures of me over the past 12 yrs, and I still look the same..not much has changed at all. Maybe the fountain of youth is in the pizzasauce! Lol!
Other than that, all is well in my corner of the world...just counting off the days til the Pet Shop Boys concert! I'm so stoked, you have no idea!
Anyhoo..still waiting for some ideas from y'all...get typing already people! Until then!

An idiot strikes again!

A wierd title I know..let me explain...
Those of you who read my blogs regularly (esp my Pizzaslinger fans) will know that I had posted recently about a dude who walked in one night drunk, asking me a lot of personal questions and standing way too close to me for comfort. Well, methinks he's just a sucker for punishment cause said asshole decides that he will make at least one graceless appearance per weekend, just to annoy me. Never mind his stupid inane questions and ridiculous comments..he has an unnerving habit of staring at me when he's here, almost like he's trying to picture me nekkid. Well, he decides to be a smarmy jackass and order a pizza 5 minutes to closing the other night. So I make his pizza, all the while cursing him in my brain. He takes his time eating it, and he's telling my Mom he's sorry for being a jerk the other time and doesn't know how else to apologize. Oh I could think of a way..how about coming in SOBER for once to apologize? Like theres an idea! Anyhoo..finally at 3:30am he decides to slowly put on his coat.. and insists on finishing his coffee before he goes..I tell him.."Take the styrofoam cup with you..I'm not keeping it as a keepsake or anything!" He says..."well..there's no garbage between here and my house." So I retort.."Oh I get it..you're one of those litterbugs who strew your trash everywhere. For Shame!" So he's ready to go..and he's just about to put his empty cup on the counter, and I tell him,"Theres a garbage by the door on your way out!" He said,"Well I didn't see it!" I told him it was kinda hard to miss. As he's leaving, he asks Mom what my name is, she told him "Beat it!" and was shooing him out the door. He then turns, looks at me and says, "Bye Beat it!". Pizzaslinger emerged from her slumber long enough to flip him the bird. What a jerk eh? I mean give us a hard time, keep us open longer on an already insanely long day, and then insult the proprietors daughter. He had it coming y'all..I don't give a rat fuck what he thinks of me.
Its kind of sickening how most men here think they can find courage, intelligence, wittiness, etc at the bottom of a beer bottle. Makes them do stupid things. On Friday night after a long 15 hour shift I'm going to the huge dumpster out back to deposit the days accumulation of trash when I notice it doesn't look right...I walk closer, and in the darkness notice, to my utter dismay that its been overturned. I KNOW it had to be a bunch of guys who did it, cause (not to put down men who live beyond the Back Forty) the men out here are absolute 'tards. And you never hear of women in this town engaging in such an activity, no matter how much alcohol is percolating through their systems. For there are women out there who are too busy getting impregnated...and out here they don't care what guy does it..I've seen too many pregnant girls out here to keep track of. I'm talking 18yr olds just outta high school, and one 16 yr old in school...Great! Another bunch of people my taxes will be used to clothe and feed. Like they never heard of the various forms of Birth control...here's another one these women should consider...ABSTINENCE!!!!! That one is 100% guaranteed never to slip, tear, break, or become ineffective in any way. I hope to god that none of these chicks presently pregnant in this town are carring earlier mentioned assholes kid...just what I and the rest of the decent folk around here need...more idiots running amok!
Anyhoo..thats my rant...my apologies to those who had to go with out their regular dose of Stranger and Pizzaslinger tales. My bad. Will work on that.
Still looking for more suggestions on a topic I could rant about...anything in the news you want me to rant about? If you want Pizaslinger to rant about it, let me know. The winner will be included in a story I will create about Pizzaslinger and her bad ass-as-yet-to-be-known sidekick...so far I got Oh Great ones suggestion for a Pizzaslinger tale..but I need just something that I could rant about. Not that I've run outta ideas out here..I do have a few, but may seem a little too much for this jaded crew. But keep the ideas coming..get creative get involved! The best reward is hearing from all of you...so just throw out any suggestions at all! Looking foward to ideas!!! Cheers!